Pregnancies can be a blessing and a gift in a couple’s life. However, in some cases, it can be an unexpected and unintended surprise. Are you dealing with a surprise pregnancy? Before you become stressed out, take a minute to breathe and read through this article.
Here are some ways to handle an unexpected pregnancy.
Confirming that your positive pregnancy results are, in fact, accurate is the first step.
To do so, take several pregnancy tests at home and compare the results of each testing stick. Pregnancy tests check for the amount of human chorionic gonadotropin (hCG) in your urine. It’s the hormone your body makes after a fertilized egg attaches to the wall of your uterus. This often occur six days after your egg has been fertilized. Your hCG levels typically rise quickly and would continue to do so every couple of days.
When it comes to pregnancy tests, keep in mind that testing too early can result in false positive or negative results.
For more accurate results, consider going to a health care facility. Clinics can assist you in testing for pregnancy with urine and blood samples. Pregnancy tests that require a blood sample can determine any problems with the pregnancy, such as a ectopic pregnancy. Experts say it might be best to wait for at least seven days after you’ve missed your period before testing to get accurate results. Don’t want to wait that long? The earliest you could do a pregnancy test is about one to two weeks after you’ve had unprotected sex.
Accept the Pregnancy Shock
Accepting a pregnancy may be a difficult challenge. It’s normal to feel scared, confused, and unsure during this time. And especially if you weren’t planning on getting pregnant at all. The results may be leaving you in a vulnerable state and have you questioning what the next steps are.
Accepting that you are pregnant is crucial to your well-being and your baby’s health.
Understand That Your Feelings are Normal
Allow yourself to feel all the emotions and accept them for what they are. Understand that being scared, anxious, and stressed are feelings that every expecting mother is experiencing. If you were to not react to a pregnancy, you are not human. Take the time to work through your emotions and do not let them get the best of you. When it comes to pregnancy, there are different options and paths that you can take that will accommodate you and your needs.
Don’t Rush Pregnancy Decisions
The moment you find out about your surprise pregnancy isn’t the time to decide whether you will push through with the pregnancy.
Emotions are high at the time of a surprise pregnancy reveal. It is essential to gather your thoughts, review your morals, and seek advice and support from your loved ones. Pregnancy is not something that should be taken lightly. Deep and thorough considerations should take place instead of making rash, uneducated, and impulsive decisions.
Communicate with Father of Child
If the father of your child is present and wanted in your life, then he too should know about the surprise pregnancy. As the father, he should be aware of what is going on with you. Additionally, you should be able to lean on him for support.
Your relationship with your baby’s father plays an undeniable factor in the steps you’re going to take next. Even if you’re not together with your child’s father, consider talking to him about your pregnancy, especially if you’re confused and have no one to confide to.
Seek Support from Friends and Family
Being that your friends and family only want the best for you, they will be able to give you trustworthy and supportive advice. Additionally, they could help you make the best decision for you and your pregnancy.
While support from family and friends is always great, it is also vital to stay true to yourself, your beliefs, and morals. At the end of the day, this child is going to be yours. You, along with the father, will be the one to raise and take care of them. Uplifting words are always welcome, and family and friends can help take care of you through your pregnancy journey.
Seek Advice from a Medical Professional
Medical professionals are knowledgeable in the subject of pregnancy and will be able to give you unbiased, educated advice. Furthermore, they could provide you with your pregnancy options, depending on your needs and situation. These experts will be able to answer any questions that you may have.
Reach out to Your Religious/Spiritual Adviser
If your pregnancy has brought up religion-based discussions, it can be a great idea to reach out to a religious adviser about your pregnancy. They will be able to lead you in the right path, awaken your soul, pray for spiritual guidance for you, and remind you of your religious beliefs. While some religious advisers may be biased in their own personal beliefs, they could still offer valuable religious input. Additionally, they would be able to help you pray for clarity in your pregnancy.
Weigh Your Options
Weighing your pregnancy options after thorough research is of utmost importance. The three pregnancy options you have are having the baby, having an abortion (if it’s legal where you live), or giving your baby up for adoption.
For Planned Parenthood, a nonprofit organization, “Sometimes deciding what to do about an unplanned pregnancy is easy. Other times, it’s difficult or complicated. Your decision is very personal, and everyone’s situation is different. You’re the only person walking in your shoes, so the decision is 100% yours.” While this decision is yours, it is still important to seek support and advice from those who love and respect you the most.
When done regularly, visualization could create neural brain patterns that prompt your body to respond to what you are visualizing accordingly.
Visualize how your life would be with the baby in the picture. Are you thinking about having an abortion? How would you would feel after having one, and how would it affect your mental state? Considering adoption? Imagine how adoption would affect your life. Visualization can reveal true feelings and help you decide what to do and what would be best for you and the pregnancy.
If you have no one to talk to about your pregnancy and need a non-judgmental listening ear, counseling can be an excellent option. Counselors can help guide you through your pregnancy and are always there for you when you’re ready to open up and talk about your situation.
Face Your Fears and Self-Doubt
Just because you were not expecting or intending to have a baby does not mean that you are not worthy of the pregnancy. Everything happens for a reason, and this baby —planned or not— is a blessing. Do not doubt your self-worth or your ability to be a good mother because motherhood comes naturally for women. You just have to give yourself time.
Join Pregnancy Forums Online
You’ll find many pregnancy forums and support groups online. Expecting mothers who are facing the same pregnancy challenges share their stories, advice, and support on these forums. If you’re looking for support or someone to talk to but would like to remain anonymous, an online forum is a great place. You can share your story and challenges with those going through the same issues. It can be quite a bonding experience.
Understand That Your Life is Not Ending
Just because you are bringing a new life into the world does not mean that your old life is ending. You can have the same goals, missions, and aspirations after having a baby. The baby is just going to be a little addition that can go along with your life plans. Yes, your life will have to adjust to the child’s care and needs, but you can still plan to do the things you wanted to do before the baby, maybe just with a different timeline.
Realize That You Are Not Alone
Women all over the world have and are dealing with surprise pregnancies. You are not alone in this. Joining local pregnancy support groups or ones that you can find online could help you in your situation. Joining a local support group allows you to find help within your community, which is great if you’re looking to have someone to talk to face-to-face.
Be Positive, Surround Yourself with Positivity, and Try Meditation
Focusingon the positive side of your pregnancy could make things easier. Acceptance, acknowledging self-worth, and surrounding yourself with positivity is critical. Meditation is a great thing to do after learning about your surprise pregnancy because it allows you to dive deep into your thoughts in a calm and relaxed state. Do not let pregnancy get the best of you. Let it transform you into a better version of yourself.
There are many ways to deal with a surprise pregnancy. If you’re still trying to let the news sink in, give yourself time and then get started with some of the tips above. And remember, just as Elizabeth Stone said:
“Making the decision to have a child – it is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body.”